How to Talk to a Daughter About Sex

by Erin Schreiner

While few parents relish the experience, talking to your daughter about sex is a must. Many moms lament having to approach this sensitive topic as it means that their little bundle of joy is growing up and may begin to engage in experimentation that could have long-lasting ramifications. Talking to your daughter about sex will never be a comfortable experience, but it is vital that you tackle the topic, no matter how difficult, to ensure that your kiddo has the information she needs to stay safe.

Step 1

Tell the truth. When talking about sex with your little angel, you will undoubtedly be at least slightly uncomfortable. While it can be tempting to fib when giving details about your sexual experience, doing so can hurt your relationship and lead her to lose her trust in you, reports the "Today Show." Keep your relationship strong, swallow your pride and be totally honest with your darling daughter.

Step 2

Avoid interrogating her. When discussing sex with your daughter, keep in mind that the object of the conversation is to educate, not investigate. Do not engage in behavior that could be seen as intimidating, such as staring her straight in the eyes. Instead, as Dr. Phil suggests, engage in the conversation in a non-confrontational manner.

Step 3

Be friendly, but not a friend. The "Today Show" warns parents not to attempt to buddy up to their daughters when discussing the difficult concept of sex. Act as a friendly voice of reason, not a best friend in whom your daughter can confide. If you set yourself up as her best friend, it will become confusing when you later try to give directives regarding her behavior.

Step 4

Allow her questions to lead the discussion. When trying to decide what sexual topics your daughter is ready to broach, Dr. Phil recommends you let her queries lead the discussion. Your tot won't likely ask you probing questions about sex practices and, as such, there is no reason to discuss these more mature topics with her yet.

Step 5

Use TV time as learning time. When watching TV with your kiddo, ask her questions about her opinions of different characters' actions. By inquiring as to how she feels about the characters' sexual relationships and sharing your feelings with her, you can create a laid-back dialogue.

Step 6

Talk to her when she is unable to escape. You don't have to tie your daughter up and force her to listen, but you may want to talk to her when she has fewer ways to leave and skirt the issue, suggests the "Today Show." Try engaging her in a sex-themed conversation while driving in the car. Not only does this ensure that she doesn't try to escape, but it also puts a natural time limit on the discussion and ensures that you don't carry on forever in your discomfort.

About the Author

Erin Schreiner is a freelance writer and teacher who holds a bachelor's degree from Bowling Green State University. She has been actively freelancing since 2008. Schreiner previously worked for a London-based freelance firm. Her work appears on eHow, Trails.com and RedEnvelope. She currently teaches writing to middle school students in Ohio and works on her writing craft regularly.

Photo Credits

  • mother and daughter image by Tracy Martinez from Fotolia.com